The relatively new British Prime Minister, Theresa May, often projects a number of good qualities.
This frequently involves admirable straight-talking, as demonstrated in her best-remembered prime ministerial line so far: “Brexit means Brexit.”
(Translation for non-European readers: Britain’s referendum decision to leave the European Union means the UK will indeed exit and the government isn’t looking for a way to wriggle out of it.)
But alas, Mrs May also has a tendency to jump into another persona and do a very naughty thing every now and then.
If this naughtiness isn’t highlighted, I fear it could tempt others (people less enlightened than you) to do something similarly bad in your professional conversations.
Theresa May’s naughty thing is that she sometimes avoids an important relevant question while pretending she’s actually answering it.
What she does in these naughty moments is to answer a different question from the one that was actually asked.
It seems to be done in the hope that observers won’t notice it.
But when in the national and international spotlight – and when you’re in your workplace talking with anyone intelligent – this doesn’t work.
It’s like allowing a president of the United States, known for bragging about physically interacting with women in a way that isn’t always invited, to hold your hand momentarily with the world’s cameras looking on and thinking they won’t spot it (more of which later).
Mrs May did a bit of question avoidance in her joint Washington press conference with Donald Trump who, it has to be said, is a far far far worse and more obvious serial sinner than she is when it comes to ducking questions and pretending otherwise.
But alas we can’t blame President Trump for Theresa May’s sins in this instance, as the British PM’s most spectacular case of avoiding-while-pretending-to-answer took place just before she stepped on that plane to America.
It was in an interview on BBC TV.
The key question was whether Theresa May knew, at the time of an important parliamentary debate about the future of Britain’s Trident missile system, that in a test firing off the coast of Florida Trident had rocketed in the wrong direction (potentially triggering a war with Disneyland, as comics pointed out).
As the Trident missile, when used for real, carries a nuclear warhead, the question about what Mrs May knew and when she knew it is indeed explosive.
Count how many times the Prime Minister avoids giving a direct answer to the question (while pretending otherwise) in this exchange with the BBC’s Andrew Marr.
I make it four avoidances before Andrew Marr declares that he’s giving up.
Another more acerbically dogged interviewer, Jeremy Paxman, had a tendency to be even more persistent than Andrew Marr.
In a 1997 interview with the then Home Secretary, Michael Howard, he kept carrying on with his questioning while Mr Howard infamously took the avoiding-while-pretending-to-answer tally way beyond Mrs May’s latest effort.
The tactic didn’t work then.
And it doesn’t work now.
Check it out here if you want to be sure, remembering the key question back then was whether Mr Howard had threatened to overrule a senior civil servant called Derek Lewis amidst a series of prison escapes.
WHAT TO DO WHEN YOU CAN’T ANSWER
The comprehensive guide on what to do with a question you can’t answer is spelt out in “Great Answers To Tough Questions At Work”.
Click on this image to find out more about the book:
But the short guide is this: If you don’t know the answer – or for some reason you are unable to reveal the answer – say so and immediately and briefly explain why.
This takes the pressure off and is helpful for your audience.
Having done that, you are then entitled to tell the asker something additional – a message – that’s relevant and helpful to both you and them.
But in the cases highlighted here, both Mrs May and Mr Howard sought to get their message across without first saying why they won’t answer the question directly.
And sure enough astute observers (like you) immediately notice and mark down their credibility as a result.
But under the normal rules of conversation, once you’ve given a good reason why you can’t or won’t answer, you are entitled to say that something extra.
Perhaps a good reason (I can’t be sure) in Mrs May’s case as to why she couldn’t answer directly was that she couldn’t give out details about the Trident missile tests because of national and international security concerns.
Based on the fact that you could conceivably invite aggression by confirming to potential enemies that there are problems with your Number One weapons system, this could well be true.
Conversely the Prime Minister could also consider admitting the truth about the missile misfire problem, and use this as an argument for the need to spend money on improving it (you can decide if this is persuasive for you).
Either would have been better for her credibility than a strategy of hoping nobody notices that you’re avoiding the question.
So don’t try the May or Howard approach in a TV studio, a workplace or a home near you!
If you or your organisation need guidance in giving great answering your tough questions you can book a conference keynote for a big audience, a workplace master class for a smaller group or one-to-one coaching.
Email michael@michaeldoddcommunications.com or phone 44 (0) 7944 952835.
Coaching can be done face-to-face (ideal when possible), by Skype or on the phone.
There’s more about Giving Great Answers To Tough Questions to journalists here: http://www.michaeldoddcommunications.com/media-master-classes/
And there’s more about giving great answers to prospects, clients, bosses, colleagues, suppliers, officials and others at:
http://www.michaeldoddcommunications.com/give-great-answers-to-tough-questions/
Here’s where my publishers, Capstone, will let you have a free read the first chapter of “Great Answers To Tough Questions At Work”:
Click on this image for your free sample:
HELP ON THOSE BIG PERSONAL CHALLENGES
While I focus on helping people work out and deliver their great answers to others, sometimes you have to determine what the answers are to challenging questions in your own life and career.
My colleague in the Professional Speaking Association, Nicci Roscoe – an executive, lifestyle and confidence coach – is a wizz at helping you do this… whether it’s managing change in different circumstances, boosting your confidence and self-esteem, getting motivated to keep fit or deal effectively with stress.
Nicci is now booking one-to-one coaching sessions at The Joshi Clinic, 75 Wimpole Street, London W1.
To discuss making life-changing appointments with her call: 44 (0) 7958 984195 or email: nicci@nicciroscoe.com
WHEN YOU’RE AT THE TOP, THEY’RE WATCHING
One of the things I’m doing more of is helping Financial Directors and other numbers-orientated people prepare for the top job…such as Chief Executive, Managing Director or Chairman.
There are many things to work on with them to help get their communications skills in the right place for occupying even higher office.
But one other thing I need to get them ready for is an understanding that when they are at the top, everything they do and say gets observed and scrutinised more closely than they’re used to.
So if we can draw out one more lesson for those heading towards the top, be aware that everything you do gets spotted and commented upon…as the two high-flying people in this picture will now tell you!
And goodness knows where Donald Trump – a master of the inappropriate with women – will put his hands when he comes to the UK on that proposed controversial State visit to touch base (hopefully not literally) with his fellow Head of State, Her Majesty The Queen!
It could be the Queen’s worst moment since the time when serving Australian Prime Minister, Paul Keating, ever-so gently touched the royal back!
Australians living in the UK – as well as everyone occupying Buckingham Palace – are supposedly still recovering from the shock.